Saturday, September 29, 2007

Moss rocks





Visual people understand a message best when it is accompanied by a picture illustration. That's me. God wired me that way, so, He knows how to drive home a point with me.

Sitting on the stone bench in my garden this morning, I was trying to read the Word, pray and seek direction for the day. In a little while, I put my coffee down, closed my Bible and got up to walk the path and pray. I began by confessing what I know about God. He is great and greatly to be praised. I lay out my concerns to Him and I know that He can handle everything that occurs in my life today. Then, I prayed for the people He has put in my life and laid on my heart.

My ADD friends will understand this next step. My right brain friends will just have to bear with me... again. (BTW I love you for this.)
I shifted from walking and praying to digging up moss. As I began fitting the moss together between the stones on my path, God made an illustration for me.

First of all, when I told the landscapers that I wanted moss in my garden, they looked at me like I was speaking Martian. Then they gave each other that poor dillusional woman look. They simply could not behold the beauty in moss. To them it was more of a nuisance to be removed instead of something to be cultivated.
Some people are like the moss. There is a beauty in them that few can see and many would view them as a nuisance that need not be nurtured but should be shunned. A moldy mark on the landscape.

Moss comes in different shapes and colors. Some of it even has a scent to it. I have read about a moss that releases the scent of lemon thyme when it is stepped on. I am still looking for that one.

I am a lot like moss. Some have seen me as a moldy mark on the landscape of life. Shunned in Junior High and High school as a bad girl, I was involved in drugs, skipping classes and selling pills. I was an angry and rejected teen ager acting like a blight on society. I am thankful that the Gardener never lost sight of the beauty He saw in me.

Moss does not grow roots. It gets it's nourishment from the air. Like moss, I was always off the path, on the sidelines, growing up the side of a tree, a nuisance reaching into thin air for nourishment that could not be found anywhere else in my life. Never fitting anywhere in life. Disconnected.
As I dug my shovel into the etherial green gauze on the edge of my garden I looked for just the right spot to place it between the stepping stones. I observed that the blue-green stones, which are a delicate in color, almost blended in to the beige of the sand which held them in place. When I placed the rich green moss over the sand, however, the color of the stones popped in contrast. There also exists a delightful contrast in textures from the hard stone to the soft carpet-like fabric of the moss.

I began transplanting some of the moss a while ago and those first pieces have adhered to the stone already, looking quite natural and like they have always been there, although it does not yet come together to cover all the sandy spaces in between. This will be a lifetime endeavor.

I have been transplanted from the kingdom of darkness into the light of the Glorious Kingdom of God. (Col.1:13) I am still learning and growing. I am still trying to cling to the Rock. This will be a lifetime endeavor. In the mean time, I will be able to come to my garden whenever I have the chance and see the transformation happening. It helps me to remember that God is not finished with me yet.

Thanks for the visual, Lord.



Wednesday, September 26, 2007

Hump day brain dump

Butterflies in my stomach when I sit in front of this computer to blog. I am so concerned that I am going to say something dumb that will be read by people. Then I will become known as a dork and doomed to eternal dorkdom. It is like the toothpaste being squeezed out of the tube. Once it is out, you can't put it back in. Once the dorky thought is made known you can't put it back into the privacy of your brain. I just looked at PA's blog and saw the photo of 2 of our Pastors. I guess I am OK, no matter what I say here. So, having used my disclaimer, here is my hump day brain dump.
  • You can't poke your mind's eye out so be careful what you look at.
  • Ed has officially begun the retirement process. He will keep a couple of small cleaning jobs and the carpet business going. I am so proud of him.
  • God does not make junk. I am a blessed and highly favored woman of God.
  • Today, Sept. 26, is the eleven year anniversary since my Mom went home to Jesus.
  • He really is the hound of heaven. Thank You Jesus for never giving up on my Mom. She received Jesus as her Savior at age 72.
  • Forgive.
  • I am a blessed and highly favored child of God.
  • There is a job out there for me.
  • Doing hair excites me.
  • I want to go to Tigi Academy and take a class.
  • I am excited about our upcoming Christmas production at the Rock. We have the talent and the resources we need to touch the hearts of people for Christ.
  • Imagine Christmas.
  • Make it a great day.
  • Be creative.

Monday, September 24, 2007



This is my little piece of Heaven.

Ed loves sitting out here with the dogs and a cup of coffee in the mornings. It has taken us 15 years to get the back yard the way we want it. I like to walk the paths and pray. I am working on not getting distracted by every breeze that blows out here. After about 5 minutes, I usually end up pulling, planting or digging someting but it is relaxing to me so it is all good.
When we first moved here, this was all wooded. I read Jack Hayford's book Glory on your house and was inspired to pray on each of the four corners of my property, dedicating it to the Lord and asking His protection on it. I held out my hand in the direction of the wooded corners and prayed from the safety of the back lawn. No need to test His provision of protection right away by tromping through the snake habitat. We have seen an occassional water mocassin and black snake out there, but not since finishing the garden.
Life is good.

Sunday, September 23, 2007

I'm tired of the Dee word

This has been a time of big Deecisions for me and Ed.
Ed has made a date with retirement. I have turned down three jobs in the past two weeks. We are NOT moving away from Wilmington, NOT buying a condo in Charleston and NOT committing to long term jobs for right now.
It is empowering yet scary to make such declarations for our lives. It is too easy to let fear of the unknown take over and take our eyes off of the awesome God who has provided for us all these years.
All I need to do is think back to where and what I was 30 years ago. Devastated. Stuck on welfare with no job, no skills and a child that I was ill equipped to raise. I was coming out of the fog of 10 years of alcoholism and drug addictions and living in a cottage with tilted floors and no curtains. My fancy home design was Mateuse wine bottles lined around the walls in the living room and beer can tabs strung together and hung as curtains around my windows. Oh yeah, and the pot plant growing in the bathroom window. No, I didn't mean to say potted plant. I meant pot; as in, marijuana. I was sad, sorry and mean as a snake.
A loving and all powerful God had a plan for my life. I never could have imagined the life I have now and it all came from surrendering to God. I am no longer angry about the things that caused me pain and torment in my childhood. Rejection was like a garment that covered and suffocated me.I have forgiven and moved on. I stopped listening to the tapes that recited that I was a loser and could never accomplish anything worth while. I was given the courage to follow my dreams.
Ed and I have made some important Deecisons this month. I am excited to see the next step in our life journey.

Friday, September 21, 2007

Observations



  • Some people claim that A.D.D. is just an excuse to be flaky. Oh look, a chicken.


  • If a person constantly overeats could they be suffering from anorexia dyslexia?


  • Dogs rule. They get us to feed them, walk them, play with them and snuggle with them and we still think we are their masters.

  • I am learning that even in my fifties, I am still learning.

  • If at first you don't succeed, sky diving is not for you.

Things I never thought I would hear my husband say:


I was working at turning the soil in my garden so that I could prep it for fall planting. Using my hoe, I decided to make it a work out and very soon was into aerobic mode. Ed came out behind me and said, "You are a very good hoer."


"Umm, er... thanks honey."

Thursday, September 20, 2007

life dance

I am still surprised when it happens.

I sat down to begin my new blog 2 hours ago. Since it is a rainy, middle of the week day, I figured it would be easy to just sit at the computer and jot down some thoughts. It took me a long time to write my profile and find the one picture that best defines who I am.

My black lab mix, Bella, came into the room to let me know she needed to go out. Ever the dutiful master, I arise and let her out the back door. I am one step away from the computer room when the buzzer goes off, informing me that my clothes are dry. I could leave them in the dryer until I am finished writing but then they would be wrinkled and I would have to drag out the dreaded ironing board. It'll just take 5 minutes to hang them up.

Bella is barking to be let back in. She is sopping wet and needs to be dried off with the big, blue towel that we leave by the back door on rainy days. Just who is the master in this relationship? She is standing in front of her empty food bowl, looking alternately at the bowl and then at me. I will just dump some food in her bowl so she will settle in.

Now my stomach is growling, reminding me that I haven't eaten yet today. I make a quick salad and as I reach up to grab the rice crackers I notice the humming of my cell phone alerting me that I have a text waiting for me. My friend wants me to email her something. I decide THAT can certainly wait until I have entered my first blog.

All settled into my computer room and writing typing away, my husband walks in with a cheery "hello" that scares me to death. Then he sweetly asks if he can read over my shoulder. I guess I am done writing for now.

How come I feel like I didn't accomplish much today? There goes the buzzer to tell me that my sheets are dry.